The Following is a testimony I wrote to one of my atheist friends on Youtube. He didn't understand how I could have once been an atheist and now am a Biblical Christian without some sort of 'Brainwashing' by either my parents or some church. But, somehow without all of that God graciously came and got me... opened my eyes to the truth and made me a new creation in Christ Jesus.
Message Sent: September 1st, 2009.
Sender: BonzaiJakab
Recipient: WWE09FAN
Maybe this won't make much sense to you. Maybe it wont even help you at all. It could be a complete waste of my time. But, hopefully by the end of it, you will recognize that I only do this in the hope that you will come to the truth as well.
My parents are not Christian. I was not raised in a church. I was not raised up as a Christian by anyone. I was not converted by any man. I used to actually believe that there was no god. I was taught evolution in school. I researched a little and seen the lack of evidence and stupidity in it. Thus, I didn't have much faith in that garbage to begin with. But, when I looked at religion, I saw a bunch of people arguing and fighting about which god to serve... I seen so much hypocrisy in the American churches. People would 'love Jesus' on Sunday mornings but get drunk throughout the week and live sinfully in other ways.
I did not want God. I wished that there were no god. I based my belief on the assertion that 'there is no god', because he hasn't shown himself to anyone and there can't be a hell, that's too bad of a place and other assertions.
Clearly, I was athiestic. I even used to research different Bible verses (like you do) about slavery and women and murdering kids and laws about food etc. I had built up a very strong case against god. The other gods were foolish (hinduism over 3 million gods, Allah for muslims some vision in a cave, jehovahs witnesses and mormons only began 150 years ago).
I actually favored buddhism more than any of the others, because it seemed peaceful and knew answers to life. But, then I researched buddhism and realized that while Siddharta Guatama (Buddha) had some good quotes, he eventually died.
Somehow, soon after all of this. I was convinced that atheism was illogical and basically stupid. I looked around at atheists and realized that while it was fun to trick 'christians and muslims' on the internet, it was just a game. And while it was fun to live sinfully (which I was...), it leads to more harm than good and ultimately you die.
I began to look at the stars and the trees and the creation all around me, and I recognized that there was a creator. I didn't have a magical vision. I didn't hear a voice. I just logically thought it out and knew this stuff didn't 'just randomly happen'.
Then, I began to think... If there is a creator... then perhaps finding out who it is would be important. Perhaps the way we live here on earth had a greater purpose than just doing whatever feels right or whatever feels good at the moment (worldy lusts and pleasures).
(For a period of about 2 years, I sort of made up my own god... He allowed me to do what I wanted to... He was kind and loving to all people, especially me. He didn't have a hell. He was good... and didnt even care if I worshipped him).
The problem with this is clear. Hopefully you can see a dramatic problem! Just because I make some junk up and believe it even with all my heart doesn't make IT TRUE! It was a lie! I quickly knew it was a lie... and began to look for evidence for the true God, whoever he or she was or were...
If there is some sort of a god... and if he or she actually did require something from us... I'm sure he or she would have let us know somehow!!!!
So, ultimately... I looked back over the religions... and dismissed the newer one's because they were basically idiotic and based on nothing at all. I dismissed Buddhism, because it doesn't have a god, borrows most of it's junk from Hinduism (because Buddha was once a Hindu) and ultimately has no answers to life's big questions.
I wanted to look at other religions, I looked into cults, old myths, and roman godesses and gods... they are cute stories but basically nothing more. They died with the fall of rome.
Islam is founded by Mohammed someone who basically wrote a book received by an angel in a cave? That basically said, Judaism is somewhat true, Christianity is somewhat true, but This book will show you the real truth which is neither. Why would I believe in a god who inspired scriptures like the Torah and New Testament, but somehow didn't have the power to keep them without error? Because Islam teaches that the basics of the Bible and Torah are true, but they have been corrupted over the years... so basically God has given us a new book called the Quran. Are you kidding me? How can one base it's religion off of other religions?
So, by this same logic I wanted to dismiss Christianity. Because it's based off Judaism somewhat.
But, when I checked out Judaism and Christianity and discovered the relationship... Jews for over 2000 years had been waiting for a messiah to come. Christianity claims the same thing Judaism does except Christianity says Christ is the messiah. Where Judaism is still waiting on theirs... It's now been over 4000 years.
So, I looked into them both. Looked into Biblical Prophecy, Looked into some of the answers posed by intelligent individuals that I once questioned as an atheist, but now I seen that the Christians kinda did have an answer. But, then I kinda brushed them off, because there is no way some guy got all sorts of animals into a boat... theres no way Jesus was raised from the dead... etc.
But, ultimately I came to believe it all. Through logically examining the evidence, looking at the options, and then experiencing the reality by actually reading the Word of God and being changed as a result... I came to be made into a new creation in Christ Jesus.
I went from laughing about him on south park, to not watching south park because they blasphemed his name.
I went from sinning willfully and loving it, to now even hating being in predicaments that might lead to sin.
I went from denying the very existence of God, to recognizing His existence and submitting my life to His truths.
Still, I can not take any credit for my conversion. My heart was a stone rock. I could care less about this Jesus. But, I grew to absolutely be willing to die for Him, because of who He is (God) and what He has done for me (atoning sacrifice on cross). He desires to save you. Repent and Believe the Gospel. Or continue on in your unbelief. Either way, it won't change the truth. Christ will still be God. The evidence is clear.
Prayer: God, I pray that you alone will be glorified. Amen.
+ Jakab +
